Last time I posted, I gave you an overview of how I am crazy, and think that I can work full-time, apply to grad school (8 different applications, thankyouverymuch) and also craft gifts for the vast majority of people on my gift list. This time, I’m going to share with you my hard-earned wisdom about who should rise to the top of your gift list for crafts, and who should sink to the bottom. I will not take my own advice, of course. But perhaps my crazy can help you be slightly less crazy.
First, let’s look at the people who should be at the top of your list for crafted items. They are, in no particular order:
1) Other crafters or people who aspire to be crafters. Why? They have some understanding of how long it took you to quilt those coasters and they will be humbled and grateful. (Caveat: If you are in competition with the other crafter over your mad crafting skillz, avoid giving them something handmade. Also, reconsider your relationships, because that’s weird.)
2) Godchildren (See last week’s post)
3) People to whom you have already given a handcrafted item and who reacted with non-fake vigorous appreciation. This is my friend R. She does not craft herself, but freaks the heck out whenever I give her jam/a baby sweater/hand-stitched potholders. She also always writes (and mails!!!) a thank you note describing how she is using or displaying said item. R. will be on the receiving end of my crafting efforts for life, and I won’t tell you her full name for fear you’ll try to steal her away.
4) Your mom or mom-type person. You gave her an unrecognizable Nativity crafted from Playdough when you were 3 and she loved it. She’s going to go nuts over that scarf you knit for her.
5) Effusive praise-givers. Yes, I know that it’s the thought that counts. When I knit someone an afghan, I have put hours worth of thoughts into that present. I like for it to be appreciated. My best friend is always effusive and thus he will always get laboriously hand-made items.
Now, who do we not give handcrafted items to?:
1) Secret Santa recipients. I hate Secret Santas, but that’s another post for another time. For now, let me just say that my caution is because people seem to be very calculating about monetary value around Secret Santa gifts (I know: I’ve been dinged both for giving something that was clearly worth more than the designated sum and something that appeared to cost less than said sum). For that reason, Secret Santa recipients look askance at crafted items. Also, in some Secret Santa practices, one gets to/has to give away/claim another person’s gift. Even I cannot think of a handcrafted item that would please everyone I work with.
2) People who do not care about crafts. These can be good people, even very good people. They just could give a shit, though, you know? Knitted hat? You can buy that at Aeropostale. Home-made jam? Shorter shelf life than Smuckers. I’ve learned the hard way that I’m just setting myself up for heartbreak if I give these people something I spent hours making. They really just want a gift card from Aeropostale.
3) Anyone we’re trying to seduce (on any level). This never works. Believe me, I know. Several men I no longer speak to are probably still wearing the scarves I knit for them.
4) Teachers. (Except, maybe, food). See my first post for details.
5) Crafting friend who have significantly better crafting skills than us, particularly in the genre of craft created. In other words, my aunt makes and sells beautiful glass kaleidoscopes. I’m not going to give her a suncatcher I made in the oven.
Questionable/Use Your Discretion:
1) Children. I have a little child friend who LOVES the things I have made for her. But, in general, I wouldn’t make my only gift to a child something hand-made unless you’re really sure of what you’re doing (e.g. by making them something they’ve consulted on).
2) Current beaux. Can you live with seeing him/her routinely choose not to wear the hat you made him/her? If so, sally forth.
3) Current boss. I wouldn’t, but maybe you would.
4) Co-workers. Sometimes this is just a lovely thing to do. Sometimes it rewards you with bitter hisses of “Show off!” You know your workplace. Choose wisely.
5) An underling. You don’t want to force that poor assistant into wearing an uncomfortable hat for the next three months. Think first, before you craft.
Anyone have any other rules? Share ‘em! Craft on, folks! It ain’t even Thanksgiving, yet.
Despite her outer sardonic nature, Shannon Reed actually loves bubbles, ducks, snow and Christmas, and is happy to start thinking about it as early as August. You can read more of writing and her writing about writing at www.shannonreed.org.
